fortitude....

Well I have been bakin' away.. more & more biscotti & I created a few new flavors! Seems this place appreciates my talents. So it's not Emeril's place but it's a start! I just wish my back would'nt ache so much. It has been bothering me since last night when I was out at a friend's house. My mistake, I did'nt grab the couch in time & ended up on a straight back chair..not good for my spine. Tonight it still hurts & I think I'll need my herbal heating pad again. Hubby, Bill has started to call me granny....yikes!
Lately, it seems that I have become quite accepting of the whole scheme of things to come. I have stopped waking up at 5:00 am. & instead can't get up. I have been baking up a storm & Bill has been gaining weight! I am inspired now to paint the bedroom...& other projects. My new outlook on all of this has made me more positive & happy! I have wonderful boys & a loving husband! They will be fine through all of this....this I now know. This will be a very big challenge for all of us but now I feel we can handle it. Yes, I still have moments of doubt but not as bad.. The length of time I am under anesthesia scares me . All the pain killers, side effects of, scare me( I rarely ever take a Tylenol for anything). No appetite scares me(I love good food..& drink..) The Morning of Surgery scares me... do they put me out right away or do I sit there waiting for my Doctor & staff to get their coffees & donuts???these things I think of now.
I also get concerned about my Doctor. Will he be in great shape the day of my surgery? Will he have had enough sleep the night before since I could take 8 hours or more? a selfish concern, I know!!! I have even had more silly thought but that's enough...for tonight...
But now, at least, I don't plan on losing to much sleep over all off this cause what would that do for me?? Notin'......................ly

Sam,You made the pants too long...

I was just cleaning up the playroom where the computer sits and I started laughing when I thought what my mom said the other day.. I told her I'd be going shopping at the mall one day & she said & I quote: " Don't buy any pants because you might end up quite a bit taller this summer." My mother is very practical & always brings a smile to my lips!
Today I took Brett to his friend's birthday party & a movie. My jeans really dragged on the ground. I think this pair always did but I had to roll them up more. I already supposedly lost 3 to 4 inches already so I hope I hold there until this summer. I'll be happy if I at least gain 2 inches after these operations.....Ly

I feel great, so no operation???

Do you have those days when everything is right with you & the world & your back does'nt bother you??? & maybe you, like I, say"I don't need this operation after all"? I even went sleigh riding with the boys....I may pay for that later, perhaps....
Am I crazy to go thru with these operations...???? I mean I'll have two of them...will it mean twice the pain??? I can even put up with the pain I guess but the constipation..don't go there. It all brings back memories of the birth of my second child, Brett. I have wonderful memories, don't get me wrong, of his birth but after...the constipation was quite unpleasant...My nurses probably have not forgotten me.. still.
On a funny note, my husband Bill is already buying up a huge inventory of wines to endure the summer from Hell! He will need it(if he can save some away from me!!!) more later...Ly

more & more biscotti.....

Well I worked again yesterday baking my biscotti! I baked so much biscotti that I'm kind of sick of it at this point... I was on my feet the whole time & my back did ache by the late afternoon. I have to say that this morning I feel good! Maybe it's because the snowstorm is over. I probably have arthritis too???
I would like to eventually put my x-rays on the blog but my curve is really, well, really curvey!! Hope to get it on at some point.
Pips seems to be doing well as expected!!! Only one operation, great news! Seems the Dr's feel the thoracic curve will correct itself over time! I so wish that will be my case too! I really don't think so since I was told it will be 2 operations, one after the other....Oh well, you can only hope-right?? I have the kyphosis(80%) which will take some time to straighten out...I guess...
I found my french tapes while cleaning out the storage room & I think I'll get back to learning a language when I'm recooperating this late summer/fall...
well got to finish making my black bean soup & then on to experimenting with some new desserts while watching the Olympics.

ps. good wishes to pips & kat(have'nt heard from her yet but sure she'll be keying in soon)

So my husband informed me last night he'll do the laundry once a week or every 2 weeks when I'm disabled this summer. Does he have any clue how much laundry is done here?Is he kidding??No, of course not...don't sweat the small stuff I tell myself.
My mom also informed him that he will see her way too much this summer/fall. Can you see my 79 yr old mother cleaning my toilets?? AUgghh! She is in great shape but please!!!! I know my husband won't clean them. Anyway, I know I won't be thking of that kind of stuff when I come home from surgery...
I did just get a p/t job yesterday. I'll be doing some baking for a gourmet deli by me. They liked my biscotti. This is will be a good thing & keep me more busy for now. In the future, after I get through with this challenge, I'd like to find a way to help others who have similar operations that leave them helpless & dependent on others. Maybe I could volunteer my cooking services or do laundry or grocery shop....
Just thought I'd mention that I found a internet site on scoliosis & it had a woman's story about her decision to have the surgery. It was a very- very detailed account of her hospital stay. What tubes were in her etc...... I pretty much skipped much of it. I like Spine whine's diary of it all....was more acceptable to me...................Ly

confessions...

I decided from today on, I will only vent my back complaints here. Let's face it, my husband & best friends have heard enough already(esp. my husband). But my back HURTS today. Ok, I confess, I got the leaf blower out yesterday & cleared the backyard of left over leaves. I mean it was so warm out for a so- called winter day. & how heavy is the leaf blower?? But when I woke up, I was more twisted than usual. Maybe it just the way I slept.... sometimes I feel like my ribes are touching my hips when I sit & they probably are...yikes
Today I feel like I just want to get this over with(already!) maybe I'll feel different tomorrow?I'm sure pips & kat can relate....They're almost there.